Relief

Finally was able to talk to the guy from the other post and it turns out that he was drunk that night. As I write this, he's on the phone, fixing his accounts and email. I'm just listening to him as he asks for help from his housemate, sounding a bit effeminate which isn't exactly my type. But that doesn't deter me from still liking him, no romantically as I'm incapable of it. He hung up the phone now but he'll call again.

I did mean what I said even if he was drunk. I love him but not as a lover as what the world would normally think of what a lover is. Not even like being in that shady mutual understanding phase. It's another thing that I go through. It's like being in between a lover and a friend. It's like being a special friend. I don't really know. It's hard to speak about it at this point as some emotions still course through my veins.